Topic > Cancer-Specific Relationship in “To Cancer-with Love – My Journey of Joy” by Neelam Kumar

Close interpersonal relationships play an important role in dealing with cancer effectively. Neelam Kumar's husband died when she was in her thirties and so she couldn't be part of her cancer journey. There is a common element of guilt experienced by the other two authors, where Paul's wife, Lucy, and Anup's wife, Amrita, had to take on responsibilities in addition to taking care of their husbands. Both Paul and Anup appear to have felt a sense of regret that they failed to be the husbands they aspired to be. Say no to plagiarism. Get a tailor-made essay on "Why Violent Video Games Shouldn't Be Banned"? Get an Original Essay The process of escaping the aspirations and dreams that Paul had set for him and his wife was not easy. He feels guilty for not being the person Lucy fell in love with. He expresses his insecurities by commenting on the presence of acne on his face and how Lucy loved his smooth skin. Paul struggled to achieve a modicum of who he was, to be a good husband, a man who enjoyed riding his bike, running half marathons, and throwing up his giggling niece. He expresses how Lucy has become a pillar for him, literally. The relationship appears to have taken on an unbalanced nature for Paul, who felt unable to help. Paul talks more openly about his ups and downs with Lucy. Toward the end of his hospitalization, he began to suspect something was wrong with his body, but saying the “C” word out loud was feared. His conflicted state of mind took a toll on their marriage, even considering the possibility of cancer was too heartbreaking. The distance between him and Lucy only disappeared once the diagnosis was clear. In a way, cancer saved their marriage. Throughout the illness, the couple faced a series of dilemmas: how long the illness would last, its severity, and what would happen after Paul's death. Faced with a crisis, the two grew closer but the nature of the relationship had changed drastically. The cancer treatment caused weight loss, fatigue, nausea, and other side effects. Anup talks about the family's financial burden and how Amrita had to sell her gold to make ends meet. He uses the metaphor of an ivory tower to express how Amrita had protected him from all the possible stressors and problems they were facing. He talks about multiple occasions when she cheered him up, how he was able to notice it. Please note: this is just an example. Get a custom article from our expert writers now. Get a Custom Essay There is a similarity in the way both male authors talk about their spouses. Their ability to notice times when they felt down or insecure about their appearance: for Paul it was his smooth skin that was now covered in acne, and for Anup it was his fear of going bald. In both scenarios, the authors spoke positively about their spouses. Any marital conflicts were attributed to the situation, but never to the partners' inability to cope.