Mom, I feel terrible about the way I used to hate you. My ability to pour out hatred on another person like I did on you was not at all limited by my age. Twelve years; it's hard to believe that I was capable of denying my mother and father at such a young age. I was surprisingly horrible, blaming people whose situations I could never understand. The distance I put between you and dad was never your fault and even if the daughter from your past haunts you and says it was, I ask you to do your best to ignore her acidic words. She's long gone. That little girl finally swept away the blinding shield of self-pity and revealed a rational image, one that represented the truth in how your decision affected my life. My previous expectation of how that decision should affect me was based on a bogus illustration of an ideal family. Realizing my shortcomings has brought to light a fact that I feel compelled to admit: Your divorce was the best thing that ever happened to me. A beautiful vision of my situation evolved when you and dad decided to separate; I developed coping skills, an appreciation for both of us as individuals, and came to understand that my life could have had a much worse outcome. The current appreciation I have for your decision to divorce is a product of my past experiences, and although you know the state of our past life just as well as I do, I feel it is worth your while to know how I truly perceived those moments before. of divorce. You might hope that it doesn't remind me that you and Dad used to argue, but I can assure you that it does. I remember how a heated argument could escalate into an argument in a matter of minutes, continually escalating until only screaming was escaping from both lungs. The sound of your voice... middle of paper... guys, for what you did. I guess my frustration stemmed from the realization that I couldn't do anything about your divorce; it became the first thing I felt hopeless in controlling. Until I realized there was absolutely nothing I could do to change the situation, I learned to deal with it. The frustration and anger became exhausting to keep up with and, thankfully, forced me to accept the truth. I must thank you for my ability to deal with the situation, which I now consider an essential element. You once told me, "Life changes all the time, and it wouldn't be life if it didn't." Now I fully understand the meaning of that line. Your divorce helped me understand that happiness is not defined by a title or an ideal image, but by the realization of individuality. I saw this as I watched my parents transform from a single entity in marriage, into two distinct individuals.